Boots and Me....

So today, I purchased some boots.  At Cavender's.  These aren't my first boots.  I've owned three pairs before.  But these boots are special.  They are the boots that will stay with me the rest of my life.  Needless to say, I am absolutely in love with them and have yet to take them off of my feet since the minute i returned from the store.  Isn't it amazing how names like Cavender's, Shepler's, and Justin's Boot Outlet Store can make you all of the sudden feel like riding a horse and pulling out your pistol?

  These boots mean a lot to me.  They aren't just a prop in a little girls wardrobe.  They are a symbol of me breaking away.  Freeing myself of all the crap I've buried myself in.  You see, the person I am today is only a small glimpse of the girl I was.  I've hidden myself away and tried to be somebody else.  At heart I've always been a small town country girl.  The one who you see in movies riding bareback with her hair falling out of braids as her trusty mare buttercup canters through a field of flowers on her parents land....well, perhaps not that exact girl but you get the gist.

   I've stumbled through high school trying to fit into the crowd.  Trying to be the girl who always looks absolutely flawless, the one who makes every body's jaw drop as she walks by.  The girl who wears all the fashion forward clothes and listens to the cool music.  Don't get me wrong, on some level I am the girl who wears those clothes and listens to that music.  But it's become all I am now.  If you met me a year ago, you might never have known I'm the girl who likes to drive down dirt roads with her Pops listening to George Strait and Brooks & Dunn (sad face that they're splitting).

   I'm the girl who likes to fish and ride horses and be outdoors all day long.  I'm the girl who would swim in a creek if I wasn't afraid there would be all sorts of scary critters in there.  I like to climb trees and drive out to where I can see all the stars in the sky...  I love the stars :D  I'm the girl who lives with her grandparents and her mom and dad in the small town of Krum, TX.  The one who wears braids to sleep every night, wakes up in the morning and pulls her boots on to go help feed the horses.  The one who gets back from mucking out the stalls to change into her overalls or her long prairie skirt.  The one who looks in the mirror with no makeup on and thinks she's beautiful no matter what anybody else says.  I'm the girl who isn't afraid of having a deep emotional talk with her mom because she hates to cry.  I'm the girl who runs to her daddy at the first sign of any trouble.  I'm the girl who doesn't let a single persons opinion impact who I am.

  In the words of Miranda Lambert " I got lost in this whole world and forgot who I am" from the song The house that built me. The first time I heard that song on the radio it dawned on me.  I had forgotten about that girl who was me. It hit me like a ton of bricks that I was running from myself, that after I moved away from Krum and fell in love with a boy for the first time, I changed.  I stopped being me.  The pressure was too much and I wasn't ready to handle it.  So I lost myself.

  But, not to worry friends.  I'm going back to my roots to see if I can capture the heart and the essence of the thirteen year old girl I used to be.  With the help of Jesus and these brand spanking new boots I think I've got this in the bag.  I'm going to move forward and be me again.  With the help of my Father guiding my steps, I know I can do it.  He's restoring my confidence and it won't be long now until I am back to my old self.  :D

In conclusion I would also like to ask the question: WHO is Conway Twitty??????  I keep hearing about him but I'm not really sure I've ever heard of him.  I will give the person who solves this mystery a crayon and a large hug.

Blessings to you on this fine Tuesday,
Halei <3